


As Far as First Dates Go, Breaking and Entering Isn't So Bad

by ASingleWhiteDoe



Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Gift Work, Inspired by arachnapete, Oneshot, Short, Sweet, arlo loves natasha, cute stuff, i really needed this in my life, this is a really great coupling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-19
Updated: 2019-06-19
Packaged: 2020-05-14 16:51:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19277449
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ASingleWhiteDoe/pseuds/ASingleWhiteDoe
Summary: Rosa Diaz enters her apartment to find out her long-time idol and secret crush is waiting for her on her couch. Hilarity ensues.





	As Far as First Dates Go, Breaking and Entering Isn't So Bad

**Author's Note:**

  * For [arachnapete](https://archiveofourown.org/users/arachnapete/gifts).
  * Inspired by [The One Where The Avengers and The B99 Squad Go Head to Head in the Ultimate Heist.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15495042) by [arachnapete](https://archiveofourown.org/users/arachnapete/pseuds/arachnapete). 



Rosa flicked on the lights to her apartment, setting down a bag of takeout on the table by her doorway to close the door and lock it with a series of locks she’d installed to ensure her protection from the outside world. 

She turned from the door, grabbing the bag again and setting her keys in a small leaf-shaped brass bowl she’d found once at a Farmer’s Market on a date. Then she bent down and removed her boots and left them beneath the little table. 

Her apartment was so quiet, usually this time of night Arlo would be whining at her from the living room to take him out. Sometimes she used a walker app if she was going to be getting home late, but tonight she’d managed to get out of the station early, so...Arlo should’ve been up-in-arms the second she walked through the door. 

Rosa clenched her teeth, walking away from the table and heading further into her apartment. She had been so careful not to let anyone know where she lived. As a detective she knew the importance of keeping her living space secret in case any criminals from her past decided they wanted revenge on her for collaring them. 

She didn’t call for Arlo, even though, if there was someone in her apartment waiting for her, it was likely they heard her come through the door. Rosa didn’t want them to know that it was her, without a doubt, or where exactly she was in the place. 

With her shoes off, her footsteps were quiet against the hardwood floors, thick black socks absorbing the sound. 

When she reached the living room, her heart was pounding. Not that she wanted to admit that her heart was literally pounding out of her chest. That would be absurd, but the truth is, it was. She was terrified something happened to Arlo or someone was there to kill her. She didn’t have any back up. 

The big black kennel Rosa kept Arlo in during the day was wide open and Arlo was missing from it. The hairs on the back of her neck stuck straight up. Even when Arlo had managed to get his kennel open, he would always be in it when she came home. Usually chewing on something he wasn’t supposed to be chewing.

She scanned the living room, breathing in through her nose slowly to try and calm her racing heart. Her hand twitched toward the firearm still on her hip, but she didn’t draw her weapon in the event that it was nothing more than Arlo chewing on her couch cushions. 

Though, even if that were the case, wouldn’t he have come to greet her by now?

She rounded the corner, the rest of the room coming into view. 

“Detective Diaz,” a smooth feminine voice said before Rosa even had a moment to get her bearings. 

Rosa drew her gun, clicking off the safety and aiming it at the woman who was seated on her black leather couch. 

The woman had her back turned to Rosa since the couch had been set up to look at the TV and not at the hallway. What a stupid way for her to set up her apartment. She made a mental note to make all the chairs in her next apartment face the door. 

She would definitely be moving after this. 

“Put your hands on your head,” Rosa commanded. 

The woman followed her command effortlessly, raising her hands up and placing them on top of her vibrant red hair. 

Rosa swallowed and walked around the couch slowly, sweat beading on her forehead and upper lip. 

“Who are you?” Rosa asked, eyeing the woman’s profile as she rounded the couch, gun still aimed directly at her head. 

The woman smirked, turning her head to the side to reveal her face. “I honestly thought you’d be happy to see me,” she said smoothly. “Peter told me you’re such a big fan.” 

Rosa nearly dropped her gun. 

“B-black Widow,” she stammered. It was rare Rosa was ever at a loss for words, usually she had a witty come back or sarcastic quip for any conversation. In the presence of her long-time idol who also happened to be a gorgeous femme fatale, though? She was, understandably, tongue tied. 

She finished rounding the couch, noticing that Arlo was laying right next to Black Widow, his head in her lap. His tail wagged a bit when he saw her, but he didn’t move to greet her.

_ Traitor _ , Rosa thought, pursing her lips down at what she’d once thought was her  _ loyal _ dog.

“Please, call me Natasha,” Natasha responded, smoothly. She was obviously amused by Rosa’s surprise at seeing her here. In her apartment. An apartment not even her co-workers or best friends knew the location of. 

“Any friend of Peter’s is a friend of mine,” Natasha continued when Rosa still stared at her, dumbfounded. “And, not that I mind having a gun pointed at me since I could, quite literally, take you in a gun-fight completely unarmed, if you wouldn’t mind...y’know...lowering your weapon?” Natasha eyed the police-issued pistol, her green eyes twinkling with amusement. 

“Oh, right,” Rosa said, voice hoarse as she clicked the safety back on and holstered the weapon. “Sorry.” 

“No skin off my back,” Natasha said, chuckling a little at the phrase. “I just figured we should start off on the right foot. Considering only my enemies aim firearms at me. Well, and my friends once, but that’s a whole different story.”

“Everyone knows about the high profile Civil War the Avengers had not long before the whole…” Rosa trailed off and mimed snapping her fingers. “Y’know.”

Natasha’s grin faltered at the mention of Thanos, and she took a slow breath in through her nose. It was obviously still a sore subject. Considering it had been less than a year since the whole snap and snap reversal thing had happened. 

Rosa couldn’t even imagine what The Avengers had gone through to make all of that happen. Especially considering they’d taken a huge hit. 

“Why are you here?” Rosa asked. 

“Well, Peter speaks so highly of you,” Natasha explained, finally lowering her hands. She set one on the arm rest of the couch and the other against Arlo’s head, scratching his ears fondly. 

“He speaks highly of you too,” Rosa responded. “But I’m not in your apartment, on your couch, petting your dog.”

“Touche,” Natasha snorted. “Though, I doubt you’d be able to find out where I live.”

“How did you find where I live? It isn’t like I give out that information,” Rosa queried. 

Natasha narrowed her eyes. “I’m a super spy,” she quipped. “I followed you for a few days. It wasn’t like you were going to notice I was there.”

“Touche,” Rosa deadpanned. 

“Honestly, though,” Natasha said, relaxing into the couch. “I was curious about you. Peter told me he thought you and I would get along.”

“Really” Rosa snorted. “Cause when Jake and I met Stark he seemed to think it would be a good idea to keep us separated.” 

“That may have also motivated me to follow you back to your apartment,” Natasha admitted. “Stark likes to think he knows what’s best for everyone, and I’ll admit he has an annoying knack for knowing when things are a  _ bad idea _ , but…” Natasha gave Rosa a once over, licking her lips. “I couldn’t resist.”

This time, Rosa narrowed her eyes. Inwardly, her stomach was doing somersaults and her brain was short circuiting because  _ the _ Natasha Romanov had given her a  _ once over _ and  _ licked her lips _ , but she would be damned if she would show that outwardly. 

Natasha stood up from the couch abruptly, startling both Rosa and Arlo in the process. She held up her hands again, as if to say  _ calm down, I’m not going to hurt you _ before stepping closer to where Rosa stood.

“You see,” Natasha said, stepping into Rosa’s space. “Sometimes, Peter Parker likes to play matchmaker.”

Rosa’s mouth went dry. 

“He can be a little shit like that, y’know?” Natasha smiled fondly.

She was so close now, Rosa could feel the heat from her body through her skin-tight catsuit. It was getting harder and harder not to look at Natasha’s body and appreciate her curves and toned abs that were accentuated by the fabric. 

“I do know,” Rosa responded, voice gruff. She cleared her throat. “I think he gets that from May, actually.”

Natasha laughed. “Don’t let her hear you say that,” she said, green eyes locking with Rosa’s brown ones. “I once saw her slap Tony into next week for suggesting less.”

Rosa laughed this time, her whole body shaking. Though, whether that was from Natasha’s proximity or amusement, she’d never tell. “May Parker is a force to be reckoned with,” Rosa responded. “Peter is in excellent hands.”

Natasha placed a hand on her hip, pulling their bodies together and making Rosa gasp despite her carefully crafted mask of indifference. 

“Oh,  _ God _ ,” Rosa whispered, a blush settling over her cheeks. She looked away from Natasha, her hardened exterior finally cracking and letting the other woman know the effect her proximity and touch really had on her. She couldn’t bear to meet her gaze. This was so embarrassing. 

“Wow,” Natasha said. “Peter was right. You really  _ do _ have a thing for me.”

Rosa huffed. “Who wouldn’t?” she asked, daring a glance at Natasha. “I mean, look at you.” She didn’t dare move her hands to motion to Natasha’s body considering it was so close she might accidentally...touch something and then immediately die from either embarrassment or the spy snapping her neck. 

“You’re not so bad yourself, Diaz,” Natasha practically purred. 

Rosa had no idea to say to that. Instead, she stared at Natasha, at a loss for words. 

“You don’t have to be afraid of me,” Natasha said. “I’m not going to kill you…” she trailed off, smirking, “Unless you want me to.”

Rosa didn’t know what to say to that either. 

Natasha released her hip, but maintained her closeness. “Peter is almost never wrong, you know?” Natasha whispered, reaching up to stroke Rosa’s cheek. 

“About what?” Rosa asked, gripping the fabric of her pants. 

“When he sets two people up,” Natasha clarified. 

“Is that what he did?” Rosa asked, finally coming back into herself. “Did he set us up?” 

Natasha smirked. “Not  _ officially _ , no,” she admitted. “I doubt Stark would have approved and you know how Peter hates to disappoint the people who love him.”

Rosa nodded, smiling fondly. Peter Parker was probably the greatest human being she’d ever had the privilege of meeting. 

“He did talk about you non-stop for almost a month before I decided to come check you out on my own, though,” Natasha continued. “So, in a way, he set all of this up. He knew eventually my curiosity would get the better of me. And, admittedly, it’s been a long time since I’ve found someone...worth looking into.”

“Is that why you’re standing so close?” Rosa asked, her boldness finally returning. Once she got over the fact that  _ the _ Natasha Romanov was cupping her cheek in her living room while her dog watched them from the couch, it was easier to carry on a conversation. Rosa Diaz was a badass, after all. 

“No,” Natasha said. “That’s not why.”

“Then why?” Rosa asked, even though she already knew the answer. 

Natasha leaned forward, her eyes fluttering closed as she pressed her lips to Rosa’s. 

Rosa felt a shiver go down her spine, her hands finally moving from where they were gripping the fabric of her jeans to rest on Natasha’s hips. She tilted her head, lips parting to deepen the kiss. 

Natasha tangled her fingers in Rosa’s hair, kissing her like a woman starved. It had, after all, been a long time since she’d kissed someone so passionately. Considering she and Bruce hadn’t worked out. 

This had to be the best kiss Rosa had ever had ever. Not just because she’d had a crush on Natasha Romanov ever since she found out about her existence, but also because Natasha Romanov was one  _ hell _ of a kisser. 

Rosa almost wished it would never end.

That was, until Arlo whined on the couch behind them and barked twice, startling the two apart. 

Both Rosa and Natasha’s faces were flushed, their hair frizzed from where their hands had roamed over each other’s bodies. 

They turned to face Arlo.

“I took him out before you got home,” Natasha said.

“I don’t think he needs to go out again, I think he’s just jealous,” Rosa responded, smirking at her. “He really seems to like you. The last person he warmed up to that quickly water Peter. He still hasn’t warmed up to any of my friends from the station.”

“That’s good to hear,” Natasha said. “I’m fond of him too. I…” she trailed off biting her lip. “I never had a pet growing up.”

Rosa glanced at her, frowning. “I guess it would be hard to. Considering.”

“Yeah,” Natasha said. 

By now, most people were aware of Natasha’s upbringing. Especially considering what had happened during her and Captain America’s very public takedown of SHIELD in order to eliminate Hydra. Rosa had read the leaked information. Most of the world had at this point. 

“You should stay for dinner,” Rosa said, changing the subject. 

Natasha glanced at her in surprise. “Really?” she asked. 

Rosa nodded. “I have Chinese takeout. Way too much to eat on my own. Plus, y’know...since Peter is never wrong about these things...you can consider this our first official date. If you want.”

“We’ll see how it goes,” Natasha responded. “We might need a do-over considering I broke into your apartment. Not sure I want that to be the story we tell people.”

“We could always make something up,” Rosa said. “Or...just not tell people. I’m very private about my private life.”

“As am I,” Natasha agreed. 

“Plus, it might be fun to fuck with people,” Rosa laughed, heading back toward her front door to grab the food. “We do have that heist coming up.”

“I actually had a few ideas about that,” Natasha called after her. 

“I expected nothing less,” Rosa smirked, bringing back the food and setting it up at her dining room table. As first dates went, there’s was unconventional at best, but at least it lead to something amazing. 


End file.
